Exxon Mobil Vows to Reduce Nation’s Dependence on Other Companies’ Oil
Anchor: ExxonMobil makes a bold pledge. This is WBS News Radio, and it’s 1:18.
Gas giant ExxonMobil pledged Wednesday to reduce the nation’s dependence on oil that is produced and brought to market by companies other than ExxonMobil. According to a company spokesman, the company is 100% committed to this new kind of energy independence.
Spox: Consider ExxonMobil all-in on lessening America’s dependence on oil… produced by companies other than ExxonMobil. / Our internal studies show that if America stops buying oil from anyone other than ExxonMobil, the nation will see its dependence on oil other than that which ExxonMobil produces markedly decrease. And we are committed to helping the Biden Administration and America achieve this goal.
Anchor: The spokesman said the company’s initiative is one that even environmentalists could get behind.
Spox: We want to see a United States that is no longer dependent on fossil fuel-derived products… made by companies other than ExxonMobil. This goal is attainable if we can just think big enough to make it happen.
Anchor: The spokesman went on to say ExxonMobil is in this fight for the long haul, and it has the country’s best interests at heart.
Spox: ExxonMobil is nothing if not patriotic. We hope the other oil-producing companies will join us in our quest to help America reduce its dependence on oil… that we do not produce. We call on these companies to cease making and selling these fossil-fuel derived products that are so harmful and destructive for our environment. Stop now, and there may still be time… for ExxonMobil to be the only energy company in America.
Anchor: This is WBS News Radio.